all the false alarms, the whole family coming to the hospital and waiting patiently, only to be told-to go home, you weren't to be born that day..but a few weeks later, it was all so very real.
Having just turned twenty one a few months earlier and wanting desperately to prove my maturity to my family, I gritted my teeth and said-no drugs, I want to have a natural childbirth. Several hours later, I changed my mind, but it was too late. By 3:20 in the afternoon I was tired and you were well on your way, but decided to take just a few more minutes to make your first dramatic entry-that should have been a sign to me. My life was about to change, forever.
At 3:27 you came into this world with a sweet little wail and reddish blond hair, all 8 pounds and 6 ounces of you. You were so welcomed by so many. Tiny and beautiful, proclaimed all in good health by the doctors and ready to go home a few days later. I was terrified as a new mother. Terrified of failing. I wasn't sure how to nurse you, change you, bathe you, feed you, or "swaddle" you. Hence, the march of the Grandmothers began. First, Great-grandmother Tillie, then Grandma Rosenthal, then Mi-Mi, all were marvelous when I look back, so loving and knowledgeable, kind and concerned for both you and me. They all knew that being a new mom meant a lot of sleepless nights and busy days. What I didn't know about was a little thing called post-par tum blues. I had gained a lot of weight, about 76 pounds, and I was depressed and guilt-ridden. I wanted my size 2 body, not this size 14 post-delivery, when are you due body.
I joined a gym and eight weeks later, I was a nursing, fat-free, yogurt-eating mother on a serious diet. But I was healthy and happy and on my way to smiling again. I could now feed you, burp you, bathe you, change you, and dress you without the fear of breaking a limb. All was good in the world of my newborn! Friends and family came to visit and raved about your beauty. You were a very sweet, content baby, who loved to play and smile and had a favorite blankie, thanks to your Mi-Mi. You were my first little Angel that God blessed me with, and I was overjoyed.