Saturday, June 16, 2012

Blessings Come in Different Ways

I have to recognize blessings for what they are and when they come. God sends them unexpectedly..
They come in many different forms and I don't always catch them..
Simple and yet so very powerful-
The first time Olivia says a new word-and I get to hear it!
J-Bug smiling from ear to ear-it feels so good.
Selena, when she says-I love you so much, Grandma.
At work I hear from a doctor that I am doing a great job or a co-worker thanks me for helping them. I get an email from an office I have made contact with with a response I have been needing to complete a file..
there are so many ways God blesses me every day.
Just the simple act of waking up next to my husband-who smiles and says-I love you..
Or the phone call from my sister who tells me how special I am for no reason..
The friend who calls just to say-hey, I miss you..
My son-in-law who calls-just to talk..
A memory of Shanny crosses my mind and makes me laugh out loud!( It must have been a good one!)
The daughter who calls to take me out for coffee-for no special occasion..

Grieving is a process. It is learning to live without someone you miss in your life every day. It takes time to go through every step of grief. During those various steps-I still experience all the beauty of everyday life with my family and friends I am capable of taking in. God still gives me the pleasures of tiny miracles every day, the sunrise and the flowers of my garden, my grand children's hugs and Sister time with my family..I have to make myself emotionally available to accept the gifts of friendship offered me, the love of my family and the
assistance from my co-workers. No, it is not always easy. Prayer makes it possible and Faith makes it happen!

I was at a meeting yesterday and was challenged with getting all seven members to participate by commenting on making a change within the VA system if it was within their means-within 12 minutes. The trick was I could not tell them I had only 12 minutes to get them all involved and invested in the meeting and to contribute an idea for change. The only prop I was given was a musical wand..since this was handed to me on the spot, I hadn't time to come up with an idea so I went with the child in me and became the fairy godmother of wishes-in a 150 words or less-if you could change 1 thing at the VA, what would it be?
I flitted and flew to each person at the table and tempted each one with the wand and gradually each one participated with a n idea, and a positive one at that! They became animated and giggly as they became
part of the game and I felt really good about meeting the challenge. The feedback was terrific and it worked out and started off the meeting on a positive note! That was a blessing for me. Some days I don't feel like I am contributing much at work. Maybe, I am a little down or quiet. I am sad some days or tired, because I didn't sleep the night before. Some days I am replaying the day I lost Shanny, and I cannot concentrate or stay focused. Positive feedback brings me back and helps me regroup. A real blessing!

When I really focus on my blessings-not my troubles. My happiness and not my grief, I become lighthearted and able to reach past myself and offer them a friendly 'hello' or a helping hand at work, a neighborly wave as I take my walk in the evening, another blessing-recognizing folks I surrounded with every day. These people matter to me and I need to make sure they know they do!

Sometimes, Olivia, my youngest grandchild will take my hand and place it on her heart and look at me. I know she does this with her mommy. It is comforting to feel her little heart beat, but more so to see her eyes shining and little smile. When she hugs me, it takes the weight of the world off my shoulders.

I noticed that about my grand kids-they can cure most of my ailments-a dose of their love, dries my tears, warms my heart, calms me down, brings a smile and brings me life and energy. Their love is so very special to me. God has taught me about so much this past year-what is truly important in life, isn't money and a status job. It isn't acquiring 'things' by working so much you forget you have family. It's about living out loud and loving your family. Sharing your time and your energy with them. Telling them how much you love them and how much they mean to you-often. Each one of my children is different and I want to recognize their unique character and personality. Each one of my 8 little blessings brings me joy-each for a different reasons, how blessed am I? God is Awesome! So, when I get down, and I do-I have to wait for the storm to pass-and the rainbow to appear, and some days, there may not be a rainbow after the storm-so, I color my own, with my blessings. You'd be amazed at how beautiful a rainbow can be when you are the artist!
The power of prayer is truly my stronghold in this journey of grief, and my faith-it grows stronger because God never lets me fall too far before He catches me..another blessing!

God bless all the Father's on this Fathers' Day weekend-those that are present and those that have gone before us and are celebrating Heaven Style..

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Rose L.